"I have to know, are you the one who is responsible for the three lasagnas I got the other day?
"bingo", smiled susan.
"I knew that! may I ask why do you want to see me puking??" I was only half joking…
"I was making a point." Susans' smile got wider when she saw my confusion.
"you see, most of the people who hear about my method for the first time react just like you did, so I need to use special methods if I want to be heard."
"I see. So what point were you trying to make?"
"in our first appointment I told you that there were love rules. Here is one of them that's related to our last meeting: listen carefully because the following sentence can change your relationship completely: every physical experience looses its' power after a certain amount of time." Let me ask you, when you saw the second lasagna, did you want to eat it like you wanted to eat the first one?"
"no. I mean – it was tasty and all, but if you told me that I needed to wait until the next day to eat it would have been o.k."
"and what happened when you saw the third lasagna?" continued susan.
"as I told you before, I wanted to puke. but I think that I know what you are getting at: you are saying that even though I like eating lasagna I got tiered of it when I ate too much, and that its just like the physical part of my relationship."
"correct, this is exactly my point".
"well, I have to say that I disagree with you."
"I thought you would. Tell me, what point exactly you disagree of?"
"I agree with you about the physical experience rule. You cant argue about the fact that something that you do a lot will bore you. But I don’t agree with the comparison that you did, between every physical experience and intimacy. It doesn’t sound right! Sex is not just a physical aspect, its also a spiritual one!
"I completely agree with you," said susan. But what is it more, physically or spiritually?"
"physically", I admitted.
"I want you to remember your first kiss ever," continued susan. "how was it?
"disgusting actually." I quivered. "I don’t want to bore you with details but let's say that is wasn’t the most pleasant experience in the world."
"good", smiled susan. (at that point I asked myself whether she understood what I said) "and can you tell me about your first kiss with nick?"
"now you are talking!" it was grate – it was in our second date and we went for a walk on the beach…"
"sounds nice, and can you tell me about the tenth time you kissed?"
It took me a little time to figure out that I couldn’t remember where was our tenth kiss.
"you see, most of the time we remember our 'first' – our first kiss, the first time we are intimate with someone and so on. But all the other experiences are a blur – because we get used to it. We are not as exited as we were in our first times."
"I agree, I can't compare the grate feeling I had when nick and I kissed for the first time to what we have now. I mean, I like it when he kisses me but it's not the same. But I disagree with you, I don’t think that your method is the solution for that."
"explain why", susan leaned towards me and I could see that she felt that if she could convince me now I would give her method a shot.
"because there is no way I will be able to avoid touching nick for two weeks every month."
"I agree with you that it's hard – really hard. But the question is do you choose to build your relationship for the short term or the long term? if you choose to try this method you will have two difficult weeks, but you will gain a renewal of your attraction every month, and this is something that most of the couples will never have!
In addition, your time with nick will be a lot more powerful, just like the first time you've met."
I was still hesitating and susan understood that I had to decide right then – or I would never be able to do that.
"this is where you decide, michelle. If you say yes you will go home and try if it works for you. If not – we are going to end this meeting now, go home and you will keep living your life just like you lived them until now."
I opened my mouth to say something but I couldn’t - my mind was a total blank. I'm usually a fast decision maker and this is the first time something like that happened to me. You can imagine my confusion!
"it's an adventure," said susan softly. "try it, what can happen?"